


His home is his safe place

by violetbear



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Arguing, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, M/M, POV Alternating, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:33:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 9,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27019612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetbear/pseuds/violetbear
Summary: Reyes feels like he owes the Pathfinder. So when he hears that her brother's recovery has stalled, he offers his home as a alternative to Meridian. He only did it to help the Pathfinder. Nothing would happen between him and Scott. Right?
Relationships: Male Ryder | Scott/Reyes Vidal
Comments: 5
Kudos: 47





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First try at a slow burn and first time posting a non Pathfinder Ryder story. Enjoy!

You look tired." Reyes studied the Pathfinder on the screen in front of him. "Yep. Tired. The council still bugging you?"  
"Every day." She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. "Even with Meridian found."  
"That's what you get for making yourself indispensable."  
"Yeah", she laughed. "That was really stupid of me."  
"Well, cheer up. You'll have more help soon. I'm sure your brother is dying to explore."

The easy smile that had been on her face disappeared for a second before coming back brighter than ever.  
"True. Now I'm sorry, Reyes, but I have-"  
"What's wrong?"  
"Nothing."  
"Uh huh." Sara had become his closest friend in the cluster. His only friend, if he was being honest. He had learned to read her well. "You're lying."  
"No, I-." She sighed. "It's classified, Reyes."  
"And when has that ever stopped us."  
"It's about Scott."

"Scott? What about him? He's still on Meridian, isn't he? Recovering and probably driving his doctors insane."  
"That's just it. Except being on Meridian isn't doing him any favours, his recovery has stalled, and he won't talk to me anymore. I don't know what to do."  
"How bad?"  
"Not sleeping, night terrors when they manage to sedate him to sleep. Exhausted all the time. He still can barely walk. He has constant tremors. He's worse than he was when he woke up last time."  
"What do the doctors say?"  
"Wait and see. They're trying to treat the symptoms because they have no idea what's wrong. No one else has been used as a conduit for an alien processor. He could recover tomorrow or he could...." 

"Sorry." He had no siblings. No family to mourn him when he went. He didn't know what she was feeling. But maybe he could help her work through it. "Have they considered moving him off Meridian?"  
"Yes but there is nowhere he could go. He needs quiet. All the outposts are bustling with people. And the Nexus looks too much like Port Meridian to be considered."  
"He could stay here." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop and think them through.  
"What?"

"Here. On Kadara." Yes. This could work. And it was about time he payed her back for not interfering in his plans.  
"That outpost is-"  
"Didn't say outpost. Said here."  
"The slums? Reyes, no. I trust you but I don't fully trust your people."

"Smart of you. But he'd be protected. I guarantee it. And none of my people would know he was here. Well, except for Keema. I would have to tell her." He could see her resolve wavering. "He doesn't need doctors and tests, Sara. They already know what's broken in him. Let me help put him back together. It's the least I can do after everything you two have done for the cluster."  
"And how do you plan on smuggling him onto the planet with no one knowing?"  
"Leave that to me."


	2. Chapter 2

"One more step and we'll call it a day." He glared at Matt, one of his many physical therapists. One more step might as well be a thousand steps. He couldn't do it. His hands were shaking as he held the bars tight and sweat was pouring off him. "One more step, Scott. You can do it." He tried but his leg refused to lift. Stupid leg. "Okay. We're done. I'll get your chair." He left his sight.  
"Don't want it, Matt. Don't need it."  
"Uh huh." Matt placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Sit down. It's right behind you."

Even that took more effort then he would have liked. And positioning his hand on the arm of the chair took the last of his strength.  
"You did good today, Scott. Definite improvement."  
"It was ten steps, Matt. Not what I'd call earth shattering." He hated this. Hated what his life had become.  
"Still. It's the best you've done all week." He studied him for a moment. "I'll help you back to your room."  
"I don't... Thank you."

Matt left him at the door to his room. Well, his father's room. Or was it his sister's now? In any case she had told him it was his for as long as he needed. The way things were going, he'd need it until he died. And that would be sooner then he ever thought. He wheeled himself into the room.  
"Scott."  
"Hi, Sara." When had she got here? Last he talked to her, she was on Voeld with no plans of visiting anytime soon. To tell you the truth, he'd been relieved. He didn't want her seeing him like this.

He maneuvered the chair against the bed. He could do this. No problem.   
"Let me."  
"No", he growled. "I've got this." Relying more on pure stubbornness then anything else, he managed to pull himself out of the chair and laid down on the bed. "See? I'm fine."  
"Yeah." She walked over and sat down on the bed beside him. "You look good, Scott."

He scoffed.   
"You're a terrible liar, sis. Always have been. Why are you here?"  
"Checking in."  
"What, my emails aren't good enough now?"  
"Harry says you're not improving anymore."  
"It's been six months, Sara. I think we need to start thinking this is permanent." Though it killed him to admit it. This was his life now.  
"You've never been a quitter, baby brother."  
"Maybe that's my problem." He couldn't look at her anymore. He turned his gaze to the ceiling. 

"This place really isn't doing you any good."  
"I'm fine. Where else could I go?" That he wouldn't be a burden. Nowhere.  
"Kadara."  
"What?"  
"You heard me. Reyes has offered-."  
"Reyes?" He looked back at her. "The charlatan? The one who flirted with you?"  
"He didn't. Okay, maybe. But he stopped when he saw I wasn't interested. He wants to help."  
"Help you lose your pants, maybe."  
"I did inherit some of the Harlow charm. He's not the first guy I told no only for him to become my friend."  
"Yeah, yeah." It's part of the reason he didn't worry when their alliance assignments separated them. Not only could she take care of herself but she had friends who would look after her too.

"I can't go to an outpost, Sara."  
"Not an outpost. Reyes says he has a place hidden in the slums you can use. Only him and an angara named Keema know about it."  
"Until I get there."  
"We're sneaking you in. No one is even gonna know you're on the planet. You can't stay here. You know that." He did. But was this move only delaying the inevitable? "This will help you." And it would make Sara feel better, he was sure.  
"Okay. When do we leave?"


	3. Chapter 3

"It's a nice place." Sara came back to the living room, still looking around. "Bit small but I'm surprised no one lives here."  
"Barely anyone even knows there is a place here. It's well hidden. I use it for a safe house." Technically correct. He didn't tell her it was his home. Or Scott, who sat in his chair trying to stay awake. He would be staying in his room at Tartarus anyway so why bother them with details?  
"Is any place safe on Kadara?" Scott yawned. "Sorry. It's so early."  
"Best time to sneak around."  
"I'll help you get settled. You need a nap" Sara walked to the bedroom, disappearing inside.

"So demanding", Reyes teased.  
"Yep." Scott smiled at him. "Thanks for this. I really needed to get off that planet. Hope I didn't make too much work for you."  
"So I hear. And no you didn't." Boxing up the few personal items he kept here hadn't taken long. Neither had removing one of the nightstands and pushing the bed against the outside wall so Scott's chair could fit. "Place was empty anyway."  
"Still, I-." The bedroom door opened.  
"Are you coming, Scott", Sara asked.

He laughed as Scott rolled his eyes before wheeling himself to the bedroom and disappearing inside also. He had been shocked at Scott's appearance when he met them on the docks. Even blaming it on the fact he hadn't seen him since that day on Meridian didn't account for everything. Dark circles were under eyes that struggled to remain open as he greeted him. The chair had been a surprise too. Last he heard, Scott was hobbling around. But most surprising of all was how thin he was. He had to have lost at least thirty pounds, which on his frame was very noticeable. He looked like he was on deaths door if he was completely honest.

"Thanks for this." Sara voice surprised him as she walked back into the living room. "If you need me for anything-."  
"No. This is me paying you back."  
"Thank you but you don't need to."  
"I insist." Should he? "He looks a little rough." She laughed but it was devoid of humour.  
"Which is the nice way to put it, I know. 

She sighed and wrapped her arms around herself. "I don't know what else to do. Neither do the doctors. It's been six months. Shouldn't he be better now?"  
"I don't know but this can't hurt. Maybe he'll get more sleep here. That can only help him."  
"And if he gets trapped in one of his night terrors? Actually, it's more of a when than an if. Maybe I should stay."  
"This house is wired with cameras. I can monitor him. He'll be fine, Sara."  
"I promised mom I'd look after him. Look how well I've done so far." He had no response to that. He'd never had anyone to look after besides himself.  
"I'll call you everyday if it makes you feel better."  
"It would. It really would. Thanks, Reyes."

"Don't mention it." Her omni-tool signaled an alert. "Busy, aren't we?"  
"Yep." She groaned. "I have to leave for Eos. Now." She glanced toward the bedroom. "I never said good bye."  
"I'll tell him when he wakes up. Go. He'll be fine."  
"Thank you, Reyes." She kissed his cheek and ran out the door. He smiled and shook his head. He needed to get to work too. But nothing said he couldn't do it here. He walked over to the couch and sat down, one ear directed to listen to any sounds of trouble coming from the bedroom.


	4. Chapter 4

He sat up in bed, wiping a hand over his face. That had been a bad one but it was over now. It was over and he'd gotten out of it himself. That was an improvement. He removed his hand as he heard the front door open. Reyes. It must be. He was the one who always got him out since he got here two weeks ago. Should he say something? Stop him from coming in? Too late. The bedroom door opened and Reyes walked in.

"Hey", Reyes smiled at him. "You're awake."  
"Yeah. Guess you can stop watching me now."  
"Hmm." Reyes sat down on the bed. "That's too bad. I like watching you. You're very beautiful. "  
"Sure", he scoffed. "Everybody's lining up to get me now."  
"Scott."  
"Don't. Just don't. Okay?" He knew what he looked like now. Too skinny and stuck in that stupid chair. Who would want him now? No one that's who. Sorry, mom. Guess I'm going to fail on your last wish for me.

"Are you hungry?"  
"What?" The sudden change in topic left him confused. Yes, he was hungry but what did that have to do with anything? "It's the middle of the night."  
"Didn't ask for the time. Asked if you were hungry. Nevermind." Reyes stood up. "I'll go make you something." When Reyes left the room, he realized they had both forgotten something. His chair was in the hallway.

It had been left there when Reyes had challenged him to walk to the bed. He'd been able to do it, holding on to the rails Reyes had set up in the room. Reyes had set up rails all over this place including across the middle of the living room. But he hadn't used them until last night. He could call Reyes for help or... He could do it himself. And did it he did. He was just sitting down while Reyes came down the small hallway and saw him.

"Just a whole bunch of firsts for you tonight, Scott."  
"Don't patronize me."  
"I would never. Food's ready if you want some." Reyes walked to the kitchen. He debated not following. Going back to bed instead. But his stomach growled, forcing him to wheel himself to the kitchen. They ate in silence, the only sound silverware on plates, until Scott was finished and getting ready to leave the table. 

"Scott, I have something to tell you." He removed his hand from the chair's controls.  
"Tell me then."  
"I won't be available the next couple of weeks. I, unfortunately, have some business that I need to take care of. I could see if-."  
"No. I'll be fine." He wheeled himself to the living room.  
"I could get one of my-."  
"I'm not a child, Reyes. I can look after myself. I'll see you when you get back."

His resolve to leave the chair in the hallway and walk back to bed had left him at Reyes's words so he wheeled himself into his room, right up against the bed. He didn't know why he felt upset at the thought of Reyes not being around for a couple of days. He had told the truth. He could take care of himself. And someone wouldn't be hovering over him for the first time since waking up in Andromeda. He should be looking forward to this time with joy. So why was he so sad?


	5. Chapter 5

Scott was still asleep. He looked so calm. So peaceful. Maybe he would be okay. Reyes turned off the screen of his omni-tool as the nomad came to a stop in front of him.  
"Reyes", Sara said, walking over to him. "Didn't expect you. Aren't you too busy doing something else?" He didn't notice any gesture but Vetra and Drack walked back to the nomad. Did she order them back or did they know they needed privacy?

"How is he?"   
"Good. Great, actually."  
"He hasn't called or emailed me since I left him here. Think he's mad at me."  
"Here." He turned on the screen and held his arm so she could see.  
"He does look better. No more nightmares?"  
"No, he still has them. But last night he managed to wake himself up. And he walked across the bedroom too. Twice."  
"Really? That's great. Guess he did need the change." She studied him. "What do you two do all day anyway?"

"I work. Sometimes there but mostly at Tartarus. I think he reads. What I can't say. But if I had to guess, he's trying to catch up on what he missed. Preparing for when he's all better."  
"I thought he had given up." She hugged herself. "Thought he was waiting to... Nevermind. You're good for him, Reyes."

Good for him? In what way? And why was he wanting to be more than just the person watching over his recovery? Scott didn't need any extra complications right now. And if he did try something and Scott didn't feel the same way, he'd probably head back to Meridian. And go back to how he was before. He couldn't let that happen. He would be purely professional. It was the only way.

"Think anyone would be right now. He just needed a change of scenery. My place just happened to be free."  
"Your place?" Stupid slip of the tongue.   
"Isn't this whole planet not my place? Don't you call me king of Kadara?"  
"If I knew it was going to go to your head, I wouldn't have even started." She laughed and it light up her eyes. She was a good looking woman. No doubt about that. But she did nothing for him. Now, Scott 2when he laughed. Mesmerizing. 

"You think he's going to be okay alone?"  
"Yeah." Should he tell her this was just the start of Scott's time alone. No. "The cameras are all on and I told him never to take off his omni-tool when I wasn't there. I also let Keema and Kian know I would be gone. And told Scott to call them if he needed anything." And had woken him up before he left to make sure he was okay with everything. And almost said screw it all and climbed in beside him. Some time away would be good for both of them. "He'll be fine, Sara. He can take care of himself."

"He used to... No, you're right. You were right about him coming here and you're right now. Should we get on with this?"  
"Sure. After you."


	6. Chapter 6

Two weeks were almost done. Reyes would be back soon. And he was glad. But also not. Two weeks and what had he done? Nothing. Well, not exactly nothing. He'd caught up on all the reports he had to read. But as far as working to get back into shape, he'd done nothing. No exercises. No attempting to walk. Nothing. He glanced at the camera. Reyes was probably so disappointed in him. No more. He still had at least a couple days until Reyes was back. Time enough to try. 

He wheeled himself into the living room. The longest straight line in the house. Might as well start at the hardest part, right? Holding onto the bar, he pulled himself out of the chair. Standing. A good start. A couple steps. No problem. But he got over confident halfway across the room and took his hand off the rail. Which is when the trouble happened of course. His foot didn't rise fully and he fell to the ground. 

"Damn it", he hissed. His pride hurt more than anything. Especially knowing Reyes saw that. He sat up, rubbing his foot, waiting for his omni-tool to ring. But it didn't. He glanced up at the camera in the corner of the room. What was he playing at? Lavish him with attention and then nothing for the last two weeks. Why? Had he done something wrong? Had Reyes seen the glances he had been giving him and decided to remove himself rather than face him? 

That was for the better though. Wasn't it? Even with all his improvements, he knew he'd never be fully back to what he was before coming to Andromeda. Two traumas back to back had seen to that. But it was the last one that had brought him to here, sitting on the floor of a planet he'd barely had a glimpse of.  
Maybe he should return to Meridian. He knew where he stood there. The physically and emotionally traumatized little brother of the Pathfinder. Instead of... 

Why did he dare to dream he could be something different? He knew why. Reyes. He knew what he'd done to get to where he was now. How he had started as a nobody and changed his life. Now he was the uncrowned king of Kadara. But he had chased that wonderful man away. The man who had given up so much of his time for him. He knew he only did it to try to win Sara but it was still a big commitment. 

No. He wouldn't give up. He wouldn't go back to Meridian. He was staying here. When Reyes came back, he'd just be more careful in how he acted around him. With Reyes's help he was getting back to full health. Well, as close as he would ever get. He wouldn't let unrequited feelings get in the way of that. He stood up, gripping the bar tight. The faster he healed, the faster he could leave. Time to get to work. 

He spent the rest of the day walking back and forth, using his break times to read the current mission reports about Voeld. Did that planet never go above minus thirty? He wasn't looking forward to visiting there. After supper, he wheeled around the house, bored. Couldn't exercise more. His body was already protesting what he'd done. What else could he do? He hated having nothing to do. 

His omni-tool rang. He glanced at the name. Sara. That could work. He answered it.  
"The illustrious Pathfinder is calling me. What an honor."  
"Shove it. I see your sense of humor is still broken."  
"Yours is. SAM tells better jokes."  
"Should have heard his first few. He's definitely improved. Anyway. Whatever you were planning on doing, don't." 

"I wasnt-."  
"My 'Scott is bored so he's going to break something' sense is going off."  
"That is not a thing. And even if it was, you're on Voeld. Way too far away."  
"It's a twin thing. How did-. Are you reading my reports? My yet to be sent reports."  
"Maybe." His eye caught on the panel for the security system. Figuring out how that worked would probably take him to bedtime. He wheeled over and opened it up. 

"What did I tell you about hacking into my stuff?"  
"Back in the milky way. Doesn't apply here." Nice set up. But it could always use improvement. But first checking who owned this place. He had a suspicion that needed quelling. "And if you're mad about that, you are not going to like where else I've been."  
"How did you even get past SAM? Are you hacked into my ship too?"  
"No. Should I be?"  
"If you hacked any of the directors, I don't want to hear about." 

"Plausible deniability. I like it." Lots of layers on this system.  
"Scott, did you-."  
"Plausible deniability doesn't work if I tell you."  
"How?"  
"A certain salarian has horrible security on his stuff. And a certain human. Someone should tell them."  
"You do and I'll-."  
"You're no fun." He stopped as a name appeared on the screen. Shena. He knew that, didn't he? Reyes. That was Reyes. Reyes owned this place. So why hadn't he told him? "Sara, I have to go."  
"Remember you're a guest there before you break anything."  
"Uh huh. Love you. Bye." 

He hung up and just sat there staring at the screen. Reyes owned this place. Which wasn't a total surprise. He was king of the planet. He obviously owned a fair bit of it. But what was this place when he wasn't here? Kadara didn't seem the place that needed a safe house. At least not one in the slums. Easier just to have a place out in the badlands. Easier to get off planet undetected that way too. He had more questions than answers. But not for long.


	7. Chapter 7

Reyes rotated through the camera feeds until he found him, having a shower. He looked better. He'd gained a little weight in the three weeks he'd been on Kadara. Seeing the scars on his chest and stomach reminded him he had wanted to ask Scott about them but it had never seemed the right time. And then he'd have to admit he had him under constant surveillance. Though Scott had to have figured it out by now. He hadn't exactly been subtle in the placement of the cameras. 

"Vidal." He looked up to see Cruz approaching him. "Ready to go?" She craned her neck, trying to get a look at his screen "What are you doing?"  
"Just some recon." He shut off his omni-tool and stood, checking his weapons were all still in place.  
"We already-."  
"Different situation." He needed to focus. Focus so he could get back to him. "Tell everyone to move out. Let's do this." 

A week later he was letting himself into the front door of his house. He hadn't checked the cameras or contacted Scott the last couple of days. Hopefully everything was okay.   
"Scott", he called. Looking to his right, he noticed Scott's chair parked outside the bathroom door. But the door was open so Scott wasn't there. So, bedroom? Peeking his head in he saw the bed was empty. Where was he? He wouldn't go far from his chair. So the living room or kitchen would be out of the question. Or maybe not. 

He walked to the living room and there he found Scott, asleep on the couch. He quietly approached him, kneeling beside the couch. He looked infinity better than he had when he first got here. Though still just as breath taking as before. He could probably leave soon. Why did that thought make him sad? 

"You didn't see enough when you were gone", Scott asked, opening his eyes and smiling at him. "Hey."  
"Hey back." He stood. "Would you rather I lied about it? Hide it from you?"  
"No, thank you." He sat up, running a hand through his hair. "Had enough of people hiding things from me to last a lifetime. Well, other people's lifetimes. Mine..." He sighed. "Did everything go okay? With whatever you were doing?" 

"It did." He sat beside him on the couch. "You're able to walk more, I see."  
"Yeah. Started trying more a couple days ago. Gave me something to do. I will be very appreciative if you don't tell anyone else about my face plant."  
"You okay?"  
"Yep. Nothing wounded but my pride."  
"Especially since I wouldn't have known about it if you hadn't just told me." 

"But you've been-."  
"Not the last couple of days. Seems I missed all the good parts."  
"And here I was walking around naked." He buried his head in his hands. "Sorry. Ignore me." Usually he'd flirt back but something stopped him.  
"It's fine. Do you want me to make you anything? Help you to your room?" 

"Your room, you mean. This is your house."  
"Okay, how did you figure that out? And don't say because I just told you."  
"No", Scott laughed. "It is nice to find out I was right though. But first answer my questions."  
"Why I let you use my home or why I lied about it?"  
"Both."  
"I owed your sister. Without her, I wouldn't be where I am now. Plus what you both did to give us Meridian."  
"I didn't-."  
"Stop saying that. You did plenty. Including being tortured for it." 

"Yeah, the torture wasn't fun." Scott ran a hand over his chest. "But that was all before reaching Meridian. Well, the physical torture. The type without that evil floaty thing, I mean. The head splitting, mind numbing-."  
"Scott." He placed a hand on his arm. "It's okay. You're safe now." Scott took a deep breath before nodding.  
"Yeah. Sorry. It just... Just catches me sometimes. Mostly in my dreams."  
"You never have to apologize. Take as long as you need here. It's not going anywhere." 

"Why here? Why your home? You have plans to try to woo me, Charlatan?"  
"No. Not that you're not..." Woah, stop. He didn't need that right now. He cleared his throat. "No. It was the only place I knew that was completely safe. No one knows I have this place except Keema. I have a small room at Tartarus that I started with. I've been staying there. Or on this couch. Easier to be closer to wake you up."  
"I should go. Back to Meridian." 

"No."  
"You're sleeping on couches, Reyes."  
"I have a bed at Tartarus. And you're not ready to go back. You'll be right back where you started if you do that." Please don't leave me.  
"So I'm supposed to keep you out of your own home instead?"  
"I barely use it anyway. And being here is helping you. You'd given up on Meridian. Don't deny it. We all saw it. Now you're sleeping better. You're attempting to walk more. You're not going anywhere. Especially back to Meridian." 

"You can't stop me." Scott put a hand on his shoulder to support him as he stood up before walking to the railing going across the room. "I'm leaving." No.  
"So you can erase everything you've accomplished?" He marched over to him. "No way you could have done that when you first got here. You could barely stay awake then."  
"Because someone had the stupid idea to bring me here at six in the morning." God, he was gorgeous when he was angry. 

"Because I didn't want anyone knowing you were here. Some people on Kadara still aren't very happy with the Initiative. Figured you'd been kidnapped and used enough in your life already."  
"Then why the hell would you bring me here", Scott screamed.  
"Because I care about your sister", he screamed back. 

"I knew it." Scott shoved a finger into his chest. "You did this to try to get into her pants. Well bad news buddy. She-."  
"Not like that." Not like I feel about you. He swatted Scott's hand away. "She's my friend. One of my only friends if I'm being honest. Seeing you like you were was hurting her. She said the doctors had run out of ideas. I figured if you were so keen to die you could do it out of sight." 

"You think-. Fuck you." Scott shoved him. "I was tortured. My body treated like somebody's toy. They cut into my flesh and injected me with who knows what until I passed out from the pain. Then they woke me up and did it again. And to top it all off, they then decided to scramble my brain with that evil device. I had to fight while in blinding pain because if I didn't everything Sara had done would have been wasted. It would have been wasted because I was stupid enough to get kidnapped in the first place."  
"You were saving your sister. If anything it's her fault." Oops. 

Scott punched him, knocking him to the ground.   
"Don't you ever say that again! It wasn't her fault. The Archon used her. Just like he used me. We never..." Scott moaned before joining him on the floor. "I'm sorry, Reyes. Are you okay?"  
"Yeah", he laughed, touching his cheek. Bruised but not broken. "I'm fine. Worth it since you finally realized the truth." 

"What truth?" Scott tried to touch his cheek but he grabbed his hand, stopping him.  
"None of it was your fault. Or Sara's."  
"I guess not. Still wish it hadn't happened."  
"So do I. Except for one reason."  
"And that is?"  
"You wouldn't be here." Looking so beautiful. And so close to him. He couldn't fight it anymore. "So I wouldn't be able to do this." He pulled Scott closer and kissed him. "Sorry. I've been wanting to do that since-."  
"Shut up and kiss me again."   
"Well since you asked so nicely." And he did just that.


	8. Chapter 8

Warm. Safe. He woke up but he didn't know why. He didn't have a nightmare so why...  
"Hey", Reyes murmured. "You okay?"  
"Yeah." He lifted his head to find out he'd cuddled against Reyes as he slept. Good job, Scott. Finally convince him the bed's big enough for two and you hang all over him. He sat up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to-." 

"Don't go shy on me now." He grabbed his hand. "Unless you're having second thoughts?"  
"No. But are you sure you're okay-."  
"Seems to me you're worth the wait." He kissed his forehead. "Go to sleep."  
"Keep saying things like that and maybe one day I'll believe you."  
"Good. Lay down." 

Reyes pushed him down, kissing his neck. He hummed happily. Until Reyes's lips reached his chest.   
"Reyes."  
"Hmm?"  
"Stop." All his happiness faded. "I can't..."  
"I know." Reyes kissed him before laying down beside him. "I can wait."  
"No. Not that. I mean-." Reyes's omni-tool started to ring. "You going to get that. 

Reyes glanced at it.  
"Since it's your sister, I believe I should."  
"No video."  
"Why?" Reyes pressed a button. "Pathfinder, to what do I owe this honor?"  
"Am I disturbing your beauty rest?" Oh, no. Reyes. He darted under the cover so Sara wouldn't see him.  
"I dont know what time it is where you are. But here it's the middle of the night." 

Reyes peeked under the cover at him.   
"What are you doing" he whispered.  
"Nothing. Don't tell her I'm here."  
"She knows you're here."  
"You know what I mean."  
"Is it?" Sara's voice had him trying to go lower into the bed. Reyes grabbed his hand, stopping him. "Sorry. Hard to keep track sometimes. But doesn't Scott wake you up anyway?" 

"Exactly. Scott wakes me up. Not you. Don't you have your own person to bug right now."  
"So that's how it is. Leave you two alone for a month."  
"That's not how it is. Scott, is that how it is?"  
"Shut up", he hissed. "I'm not here."  
"Scott says he's not here."  
"Is he hiding under the blanket?"  
"So you have experience with his type of crazy?"  
"Yep. Years of it. Well, this changes things."  
"Oh?"  
"Maybe. I don't know. I called to say we'll be touching down on Kadara about the time the sun rises, I guess. See you two then." 

"She's gone. You can come out now." He sat up and slapped Reyes.   
"What the hell? I told you-." He growled before flopping back down onto his pillow.   
"You make noises like that and the waiting is going to be torture."  
"My doctors would murder not only me but you as well." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry about that."  
"Going to explain?" 

"Ever lived in someone's shadow? Had someone else's expectations of what your life was going to be forced on you since before you were born?"  
"The opposite actually. You think Sara-."  
"No. Maybe. She probably did have someone in mind for me. But she wouldn't push. She'd just want me to be happy. And I am so... I don't know." He couldn't explain why his first reflex was to hide when Sara called. Why he'd been mad at Reyes. "I'm a mess, Reyes. Even before Meridian. If you were smart-." 

"Hush." Reyes pulled him close, kissing him. "I want you. All of you. We'll take every day as it comes. Every moment. Okay?"  
"Okay. Deal. We should continue from where we left off."  
"Sounds like a plan." Once more Reyes's hands moved to his chest. Once more he felt nothing.  
"Reyes, stop."  
"Okay." Reyes pulled away and turned on the bedside lamp. "This isn't a complaint but you're giving off mixed signals, baby." 

"I know. Give me your hand." He took it, breathing out. "Okay. Feel this." He put Reyes's hand over one of his scars. "I can't... Whatever they did. I can't feel you. I can't feel anything." He waited for Reyes to saw something. He knew he already didn't mind the sight of his scars. But would this now change with him knowing he would never respond to his touch completely? "No one knows if it's permanent. But it looks like it might be." Reyes traced a finger over his scars. When he touched the small patches in between them, he flinched. It tickled. 

"Hmm. I had wondered. What do you remember happening?"  
"Not a lot. Until I was sitting on the bridge next to Captain Dunn. I see things in my nightmares but I don't know if that's what really happened or I'm making it up to cover up something worse."  
"Whatever it was. Whatever happened. You survived it. You survived and you're here now. Safe with me. They're dead and they're never going to hurt you again."  
"Not all of them."  
"No kett will ever get close to you again. I promise you that. Okay?"  
"Okay. We're okay?" 

"Yes. You didn't run seeing my scars. Why would I run seeing yours?"  
"Your biggest one is a slight divot from a bullet. Mine almost cover my entire front."   
"I like your front. Scars and all. I like all of you actually. Can I turn off the light now?"  
"Yes." He did so before laying down beside him, tugging him close.  
"Now I don't know about you but I'm tired. And we're having a visitor in the morning. Let's go to sleep, huh?"  
"Sounds like a plan."  
"A great plan. Hush now. Close your eyes." He listened to him and knew nothing else until the sun was shining into the window.


	9. Chapter 9

"Where is it? Stupid shoe." Reyes sat on the couch, scrolling through a report on his data pad as Scott mumbled to himself, stalking through the house. "Where are you?"  
"Do you actually expect it to answer? Because if so, I think we need to add that to my report to Harry."  
"No. But it was right here. Right beside my other one in the closet. Where is it?"  
"Maybe I hid it so you couldn't leave."  
"Sounds like something you'd do." 

He smiled as Scott sat down with a huff beside him.  
"Do you really think so little of me? Hiding a shoe? I could do way better then that to get you to stay."  
"Then why don't you?" Scott cuddled against him, resting his head on his shoulder. "What you working on?"  
"Double checking my report before I send it to your doctors."  
"What's to double check? Just put 'he's cured. I'm a miracle worker'."  
"I am but you're not. Which is why I'm not trying to prevent you leaving."  
"Thought you liked me. Don't make me go."  
"I love you. You're going."  
"Love you too. I'd love you even more if-."  
"Go find your other shoe. Your sister will be here soon." 

Scott had been with him for two months. Two glorious months. But now his doctors wanted to see him in person. And they wouldn't come to Kadara. Not that he really blamed them. So in less than an hour the Tempest was landing to pick Scott up and take him back to Meridian. Take him away from him. He was going to miss him so much. But he needed the check up. Sure, Scott was walking easier now but he still stumbled occasionally. His tremors had calmed except for when he was tired or upset. And his nightmares had gone from every night to every second or third night. But his headaches were still bad. Just a couple days ago, Scott hadn't been able to do a thing besides lay in bed in the dark because of one. He needed to be checked out. Reyes didn't want to lose him. 

He pulled his legs up and leaned against the arm of the couch. Something poked him in the back. He reached behind him and pulled it out.  
"I found it."  
"Found what?" Scott walked back into the living room. "Oh." He walked over and grabbed his shoe out of Reyes's hand. "Yay, now I can leave", he deadpanned.  
"Did you hide it?"  
"Really, Reyes." Scott pouted, putting a hand on his chest. "I can't believe you think so little of me." 

He laughed and pulled him down beside him.  
"If you hid it, I'd never find it?"  
"Exactly. You promise to miss me?"  
"Every minute you're not here." He stood up and held out his hand. "Come on. I'll walk you to the docks."  
"I'm walking? Thought I was going to get thrown in a crate and carried there."  
"We did think about it. Thought you would enjoy this more. Ready to see Kadara?"  
"Absolutely." 

He deliberately made them leave the house early. He wanted to show Scott Kadara just as much as he wanted to see it. He deliberately hurried Scott through the slums though. Still a little bit too dangerous for him right now. But Scott loved the port. He gave as good as he got when it came to Umi, managed to convince the weapon vendor to give him a pretty hefty discount on a mod, and charmed Keema utterly. She wanted them to stay a while longer but Reyes had other plans. Another spot he had to show him. 

"Here." Reyes got off the ladder and turned, extending his hand to Scott. "Give me your hand." He pulled Scott up. "There we are. You okay", he asked, noticing he was breathing a little hard.  
"Wow." Scott looked around, not seeming to hear him. "That's some view."  
"Worth the climb?"  
"Definitely." Scott threw his arms aroumd him, kissing him. "Thank you."  
"You're welcome. But what for?" 

"Giving me my life back."  
"That was all you. I just provided a safe place."  
"You did much more than that." Scott sighed, leaning his head on his shoulder. "I don't want to go back. I know why I have to but I don't want to."  
"Come here." He lead Scott to the container he'd set up ages ago. "Sit." And he pulled him down with him to make sure he did.  
"You know this place would be a great place to watch the sunset."  
"It is. Ask your sister. We came up here after Sloane's party. With some incredible whiskey I had stolen." Scott studied him. "What?" 

"I have never been happier that Sara doesn't like men. Because otherwise..."  
"Lucky for you, she doesn't. But even luckier for us, I only had eyes for you."  
"Sap", Scott slapped his shoulder. But he saw the blush red cheeks Scott tried to hide. "Bet you say that to all the boys."  
"Well you know flirting is my middle name." Scott laughed. Just as he hoped he would. "But seriously, I always knew it would take a very special person to settle me down. You're that person, Scott."  
"Wow." Before Scott could say anything else, the sound of the Tempest split the air.  
"Come on. The sooner you leave, the sooner you'll return."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for now but I loved writing them like this so I'll probably do more in the future. Thanks for reading.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott talks to Harry and hears some unpleasant news

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did say I didn't think I was done with this yet.

"Great. You took my blood. We talked. Can I leave now?" He hated it here. The sooner he could leave the better. Harry didn't respond as he placed the vials into his case. Screw this. He started to stand when Harry grabbed his arm.  
"Nice try. But we're almost done. And you might as well stay here because your ride back doesn't leave for another twelve hours." He groaned and laid back on the bed as Harry released his arm. At least he'd been able to convince him to conduct the tests in his dads quarters instead of the med bay. The bed was a lot more comfortable here. 

"It's not that bad", Harry teased him, tapping his bent right leg. "Straighten this, please."  
"I'm comfortable." He closed his eyes, snuggling his head into the pillow. "Very comfortable."  
"Should have stayed where I was. I bet Lexi doesn't get this much grief from Sara."  
"Told you that was a bad move. She's the good twin. Fine", he sighed. "Go ahead. Let's get it over-." He opened his eyes and raised his head to see Harry had his hands on his chest. "Oh. Fuck." He dropped his head back down. 

"So still no feeling then, I see."  
"No." Reyes had spent a night with him mapping out how far the damage went. Turned out the nightmares he was staying awake to avoid would have been more enjoyable. "Can't feel anything from the base of my neck to my waist."  
"Nothing?"  
"In-between the scars at some parts I can a little. I can-. Here." He raised his head and grabbed Harry's hand placing it against his skin where it met the mattress. "Can feel here. And my back. And my arms."  
"Just your core then."  
"Yeah", he scoffed. "Just my core. That's nothing." 

"You're actually very lucky, Scott."  
"I feel lucky."  
"You can't feel contact but your muscles still respond. You still have function."  
"Feel luckier if I could feel anything."  
"If this had gone another way, you wouldn't be saying that. We believe your nerves overloaded somehow causing them to die."  
"Totally forever dead or temporarily dead?"  
"If they instead got stuck in that state, even the slightest touch of air would be agony for you. You can sit up now."  
"So what you're saying." He sat up and pulled his shirt back on. "Is my only options were agony or nothing? I had SAM. Couldn't he have done something?" 

"You told me the Archon only connected SAM to you once you reached Meridian. We believe the damage was already too great for him to fix on top of trying to keep you alive."  
"Could still feel everything on Meridian." When Sara had finally reached him and started to pull everything off him, he had screamed and almost blacked out. The feel of his jump suit over his bloodied skin had been horrific. But worse was when he was in med bay and getting it peeled off him. He was sure he had traumatized some with his screams of agony before they were able to put him under. "Until I woke up from that stupid second coma. If you hadn't-." 

"You wouldn't be here now. The damage to your brain was-."  
"I know. I do. And I'm grateful. Most days anyway." Reyes had helped him get there. And was proving impossible to get rid of. Not that he was trying too hard. "Be more grateful if I was fully cleared to do the job I came here to do."  
"Scott." With that one word he knew. He was being permanently benched.   
"Why", he glared at Harry. "You owe me that much."  
"It's not just me or Lexi looking at your reports. And some have expressed concern of you getting injured in the field and not noticing because-."  
"My armour has sensors. I could adapt it."  
"Yes. But that wasn't the only concern. Your tremors." 

"Get better everyday."  
"But they still increase during times of stress. What's more stressful than being shot at?"  
"I've been training since I was ten. I can keep my head in battle." He stood up, clenching his hands shut as he felt the tremors grow but not his biotics flickering over his arms."Dad made sure of it. What they think I'll drop my weapon or not be able to shoot straight?"  
"Scott, you know I don't believe you'll never get out there. Neither does Lexi. Or Sara. You just have to take it one day at a time like you've been doing. You'll prove them wrong eventually."  
"Or I could do that now." He was sick of feeling weak. Broken. Useless to everyone. "Where's the firing range here?"  
"Scott."  
"Tell me or I'll find it myself. It will just take me longer." Harry sighed.  
"Take the tram two stops then make a left and two rights. Do you want me-."  
"No." He stormed out of the room.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reyes pines and someone notices

Reyes knew Scott could handle himself. Especially when all he faced was an examination by his doctors. So he wasn't worried. He only missed him. Which was ridiculous. They hadn't even known each other two months ago. He shouldn't be missing him this much. Missed him since the moment the Tempest lifted off into the setting sun. And had thought when Scott was back, he'd make sure they enjoyed watching it together. 

"When will he be back?" He turned his attention from the report he had read but had no memory of to Keema. She was sitting back against her throne, legs crossed, looking very pleased with herself. Too pleased.   
"Who?" He looked down at the report and grabbed a name at random. "Cruz?" No, idiot that's a she.  
"Your delightful visitor, Scott Ryder."  
"He hasn't even been gone an." He checked the time. "Hour. Hasn't even barely left. Want to give him some time before you start with the questions?"  
"You miss him." 

"Hasn't been gone long enough for that either. And if I did miss him, which I don't, it would be because the last two months my entire focus has been on him. He left a big hole in my schedule I now have to fill."  
"And in your heart as well."  
"Didn't you once tell me I have no heart?" A conversation between two new business partners after their first successful job. A long time ago. 

"What I said is you act like you don't. It's what makes you appear so ruthless. What makes everyone second guess you."  
"Except for you."  
"Me and Ryder. And I mean both of them. You opened up to each of them. You've become a better person because of it. You found love."  
"Love? It's been two months." No need to mention to her he'd already told Scott that he loved him. "Way too soon for that talk."  
"When you know you know. And I know one thing."  
"What?" 

"We need someone to fly to Meridian to pick up that shipment from Voeld. Or else it will sit there for a week or more before being cleared. Then the food in it from Eos will rot instead of feeding families here. So we need a smooth talking pilot to catch the midnight shuttle at the outpost. Do we know someone like that", she asked, smiling like a cat who had eaten the canary   
"You planned this?"  
"No. But sometimes things have a way of lining up perfectly. I can give you a couple days. The N'salia issue is too time sensitive to wait longer than that."  
"And yet you're sending me away."  
"To bring that boy home. He needs you. So go get him."


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott feels useless and Reyes reaches Meridian and talks to Harry.

Scott laid in bed cursing his continued existence. He was worthless. Why was he still here? He couldn't do anything productive anymore. His failure at the firing range proved that. He hadn't been able to hit a quarter of the targets. Hadn't got through but half of the program before he had to quit due his tremors making it hard to hold the pistol. The pitying look the turian supervising the range gave him just added to his shame. His feeling of worthlessness. But he was worthless. All he was good for was... Nothing. He was a good for nothing who shouldn't even be alive. He hated what his life had become. Constant tremors that were very bad at the moment. The headaches, one of which was amping up to be another killer. 

"Scott, are you alright", SAM asked.  
"Still here, SAM." He clenched his hands, trying to slow the tremors. "Still here."  
"That is not what I asked. Are you having one of your bad days?"  
"I'm having a bad life. Have been ever since I woke up here."  
"Okay." The lights of the room dimmed. "Do you want me to call Harry?"  
"No."  
"Sara will be free in an hour but I could get her here sooner if you wish."  
"No." He turned onto his side. "Just go away."  
"Okay. But I'm here for you if you feel like talking." He didn't feel like feeling anything. He just wanted to be numb. To fade away to nothingness. 

* * * 

Reyes thanked the men and locked up the shuttle. The pretense for his visit was finished. Now to find the real reason for him being here. To start he should find Scott's doctor. He wanted to hear first hand how Scott was doing. He walked onto the commons scrolling through his data pad. All he knew was his first name. There he was. Harry Carlyle. Now to find him. 

"Reyes?" He looked up to see he'd almost ran into one of Sara's crew mates.   
"Hello, Vetra. What are you doing here?"  
"Doing my job. Isn't yours on Kadara?"  
"My job takes me lots of places."  
"If you were coming to Meridian, why did we have to pick Scott up? Not that I'm complaining. It was nice to see him. But why didn't you?"  
"Didn't know I was coming here until after you left. Do you know where Dr. Carlyle would be? Or Sara?"  
"Sara's in a meeting. Or on her way to one. She planned a bunch for when we were here. Harry should be at the clinic. But he also might be at Ryders quarters. It's where he treated Scott before. Sara told me he hates anything medical." 

And yet he was constantly surrounded by doctors. Poor Scott.  
"Do you know the way to the clinic?" Following Vetra's directions he soon found himself stepping inside the clinic. Looking around he spotted Dr. Carlyle sitting at a desk in the back of the room. Totally focused on his work, he didn't look up until he walked over and spoke.  
"Dr. Carlyle?"  
"Yes? I know you. Don't I?" 

"Reyes Vidal. I was looking after Scott on Kadara. How is he?" He saw Dr. Carlyle was going to protest. "And I don't mean medically. You've known him a long time." Since the twins were babies from what Scott had told him. "I know you care about him." He pulled out the chair in front of the desk and sat down. "You want what's best for him. As do I. He survived what the Kett did. I want to make sure that remains true." 

"That just became harder. Damn them."  
"What?"  
"Two days ago, the council, or rather Tann, adjusted Scott's file. Unfit for duty due to medical reasons. I've been arguing with them ever since it came through. I told Scott. He didn't take it well." Damn it.  
"You left him alone?" After all his work to get Scott to a better place mentally. It was ruined. Scott hadn't even been here six hours. 

"Of course not. He charged to the shooting range, determined to prove them wrong. When he finished there, he returned to his room. SAM's monitoring him. He doesn't want to see me. And I don't want to see him. I'm just a reminder of what happened to him. I thought to leave him alone for the rest of the day. But if the reports I read from you are accurate, he would probably love to see you right now."  
"Good." He stood up. "Because I only came here to see him. Where is he?"


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott's hurts are soothed by Reyes.

A sudden change of pressure had him whimpering. His head was killing him. The pain beating so loud he worried his head would explode. His trembling hands were unable to use his omni-tool to call for help with the pain. He didn't want to ask SAM to call for help because even the sound of his own breath was too loud for his head. He just wanted everything to be over. Nothing could be worth staying alive for with all the pain he was in. No one would miss him anyway. Not his useless self. 

So focused on the pain, he didn't feel the hand run down his back. Didn't hear the murmured words of comfort and love. Didn't feel the blanket being pulled over him, tucking him in tight. What he did feel was the pain slowly lessening. Dying down until the sound of his breathing didn't hurt him anymore. No. Not just the sound of his own breathing. Someone was in the room. Someone was beside him on the bed. 

He cracked open his eyes to see a shadowed figure sitting beside him. SAM would have called security if they were a threat, right? Of course. So who? As his eyes got used to the dim lighting, he finally realized who it was. Reyes. No. He must be dreaming. Reyes was on Kadara. He'd wanted him here but was too afraid to ask, not wanting to hear no. He'd left him behind. So he must be dreaming. 

"Seems to be helping", Reyes whispered. "Feeling better, Scott?"  
"Reyes? I'm dreaming."  
"Do I feature in your dreams regularly then?"  
"No but you're not here."  
"But I am here."  
"No I mean." Reyes grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it.  
"I know what you mean. Keema practically threw me in a shuttle. Seems I was pinning away without you beside me." 

"I haven't been gone that long." He loved Reyes. And he knew he loved him. But he could never figure out why. Especially when he was at his lowest. Reyes ruled a planet. He was a king in all but name. What could he offer him that someone who wasn't as broken as him couldn't. "You didn't miss me yet."  
"I miss you every moment you're not in my sight. Even when I know you're just in the next room. You give me purpose, my love."  
"You rule a planet."  
"And it would feel like a barren wasteland without you beside me." 

Oh. He had no reply. What could he say that wouldn't sound hollow compared to that? Reyes didn't seem to expect one as he turned and started fussing with something beside him.  
"Now if you feel like you can keep it down, I have some pills to help with the pain. Or if not or you think you need it working quicker, I do have it in needle form."  
"Sick of needles."  
"I figured." Reyes turned back to him and removed the heat pad he hadn't noticed was on his forehead. "You can't be laying down though. Let's get some more pillows under you." 

Slowly and carefully, Reyes got him into a half sitting up position before placing the heat pad back on his forehead.   
"Don't move too fast or that will slide right off. Remember?" He did. It had been Reyes who had helped him figure out a heat pad on his forehead helped make his headaches disappear. He had done so much for him. Was still doing so much for him and never expecting anything in return.   
"Reyes."  
"Hush. Pills first. Open your mouth." Reyes slipped the pills in then held a bottle of water to his lips so he could wash them down, rightly realizing he wouldn't be able to do it himself. Reyes always seemed to know when he needed help. Just another reason he was lucky to have him beside him. 

"There." Reyes checked his pillows. "Now we wait for that to work. Need anything else."  
"You love me."  
"I do. I never thought I'd love anyone as much as I love you."  
"As broken and as useless."  
"You are not useless", Reyes interrupted him. "Broken, yes. Useless, never. Even if you never convince the council and I don't, for a second, believe you won't prove them wrong, you will never be useless. I want you to forget you even know that word. And as for the matter of you being broken, I believe you will change that too. You've already started too." 

"Because of you."  
"No. It was all you. I just provided a safe place to heal."  
"You're mine."  
"That I did not expect to happen." Reyes smiled, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. "But I'm glad it did."  
"Me too." He closed his eyes as he felt the pain disappear. "Me too."


End file.
